Soulful Art Exhibit & Cocktail Party, Oct 1st, 2016

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Casting Off: an Opening and a Closing. 7-10 pm 1065 Paiute Way, Suite 120, Bend, OR 97702.

Come celebrate this opening and closing of a body of work by ME! This work chronicles the year long journey of healing from breast cancer. Everyone is faced with unfathomably painful events during their lifetime and this body of work looks at how I moved through the fear, the pain and the grief of having cancer to find the gift on the other side.

My narrative paintings tell the story of different moments where instead of collapsing into myself I opened up to what needed to be expressed and got busy with my canvas, paint and brushes. This body of work has never been viewed in its entirety in one space so this evening represents both an opening and a closing of this journey and this work.

There will be an Opening Ceremony by local artist, Julia Junkins to set the soulful intention for the evening at 7pm followed by music, cocktails, food and interactive surprises.

I believe my work is especially poignant when you consider that I am a retired Marine Corps Captain who served a tour in Fallujah Iraq in 2006. Military women are 20 – 40% more likely to get breast cancer than their civilian counterparts. Just saying.

 

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Saturn Rising by Katariina Agnes Fagering          30×30 on canvas 

Artist Statement from Katariina:

Katariina Agnes Fagering is a midwife of possibilities, collector of sacred stories, and a motorcycle-riding warrior for truth, beauty and above all things- love. Her paintings explore that ethereal world that is often experienced on a subconscious level, reaching into your memories and pulling out something that can’t always be articulated right away. Mystical animals, women and ancient symbols appear on the canvas often even surprising Katariina. She believes firmly that every painting she paints is painted for another and just needs to find its match, because this happens over and over again.

She lives here in Bend with her family.

Event Page: https://www.facebook.com/events/339302846418457/

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Exhausted by Katariina Agnes Fagering     30×30 on Canvas

 

 

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All of Me

death and rebirth by Katariina Fagering

Newest painting finished this morning

This journey with cancer has called forth every emotion and question I could muster. I have spent many days walking the river’s edge asking what wants to be heard and what needs to be seen? My approach has been to open, rather than collapse around my diagnosis and the fear that wells up around such an event.

What came up for me is the need to embrace all of me, the light and dark. The depths of sorrow and despair alongside the joy and gratitude. I’m done with compartmentalize-ing all the pieces and parts of me that make up the wholeness of ME! Just like Inanna and Persephone who were able to bridge both the world of the sun and the underworld with grace and eloquence, I don’t want to leave any part of myself behind.

Being congruent and integration have been my mantras during this season of reconciliating this idea of cancer within me. I had to first, soften and open to the idea of the cancer within  and then soften and open some more to the idea that a bilateral mastectomy is the right choice for me.

I am feeling buoyed and supported by all those around me and also my higher self who can see that I’m a rock star for even showing up in this world. I will still mourn the loss of my breasts and will feel the sorrow that goes along with it but I know very well that, “this too will pass.”

death and rebirth by Katariina Fagering

I wrote this poem while walking along the river’s edge. I came to a tree that had shattered and fell head first into the river.

Shattered to be Reborn

Was I always

broken and submerged

in the stillness

of a fast-moving

river?

Did I fall head first

shattered, splintered, broken

overwhelmed by the deluge

of water filling

my lungs?

Or did I drown in the

pure healing waters

of the raging river?

And was I washed clean of my sins

baptized by the great Mother?

Did my dark, wet hair tangle

flowing down stream

under the calm surface

where the water rages

in the deep shadow?

Did my rotting flesh and white bones

feed and nourish

the river banshees

who greedily devoured

the silvery skin of my old beliefs?

I must have

shattered to fall a part.

I drowned to be cleaned.

I decayed to let go of the old.

I’m writing this to be reborn.

Sunday Creating . . .

The beginning

Today, finally, after weeks of not painting I finally went up to my studio & worked on a this painting that had been sitting on my easel forever. It felt so good to be painting & creating again, without any expectation of what I would end up with. I just flowed in & out of colors, designs, scribbles & so on! I am not done with it just yet, but the most of it is done.

The words say, “Girl you’re amazing, just the way you are!”

The first step is to cover a your canvas (in this case it is a piece of cut up tempered hard board from Home Depot) with paper & paint in any pattern really, just to create some dimension to the piece. This was done weeks ago so the glue was dry.

Next is to wash over the papers on the canvas to create a backdrop for the image that will be painted. This can be so hard for me to do, but I’m learning that it is important.

wash it all away

Next I pick out the main image I want to focus on & either transfer, paint or collage it on. For this painting, I had planned to transfer this image on but I used too heavy of paper & then it didn’t work properly (these sort of flubs happen frequently) so I rolled with the punches & collaged the failed transfer image onto the canvas & then painted over it. Then I just added embellishments, a bird, some words, & other designs as they flowed out. I wish I had a better plan, but I usually don’t plan much, so the color & layout just evolve as I progress with the painting.

Anyways, it’s fun & highly therapeutic. The teacher from last week’s workshop saw some of my photographs & was so impressed by them that she asked me why I bothered with painting. It sort of hurt or rather cut at me because here I was working on improving my painting skills but it was a compliment as well. It just felt like an insult to my desire to paint better – or more betterererer.  But I thought about it & realized that I paint because it’s therapeutic. It just feels good to be in a creative flow with paint splashing everywhere & layering & layering. I love the process, it really doesn’t matter to me if I ever go anywhere with it. I’m enjoying creating now & watching my deeper creative emerge ever so slowly the more I am able to quiet the outside voices. I think if you have the inner urge to create, then we are obligated to create, even if it just to find some inner peace.

almost finished

i birthed a beautiful being . . .

I birthed a beautiful being

This is my newest painting – well it’s a charcoal with paint around it. I call it, “I Birthed a Beautiful Being.”

I’m not quite done with her but I put her on my wall anyway, to sit with for awhile.  I love her body but her face is causing me a lot of grief, but oh well, I’ll keep on it.  This is the evolution of her.

1st sketch

Phase 2

I birthed a beautiful being

Words on Painting

The words are, “I birthed a beautiful being. I fed that beautiful being with my breasts. My baby is a miracle. My body is a miracle. I will honor me for the miracle that is me.”

I have to say it is so freeing to create without thinking about selling it or if someone will want to buy it or not. It changes everything. Since I embarked on my path of devoting the next 5 years to the study & practice of creativity in every form that ignites me, much has changed. I can see my skills getting better & I have a better grasp of how to approach a project with more confidence & not just guessing. I have a loooong way to go. It’s only been about 8 months, so while it is fun being in the process & seeing my progress, I can’t wait to look back & see where my journey has taken me! Okay, okay, I know . . . for now I will stay in the moment & enjoy la dolce vita!!!

For now, I’m going to work on lightning up her face!